So yesterday we were treated to the edifying spectacle of That Fucking Guy and That Fucking Kennedy going on TV to announce that they had figured out what causes autism, and that it’s Tylenol.

I am not making this up. It really happened, unless I had some kind of psychotic break, which is always a possibility… and who could blame me? But as I sit here typing this, stone cold sober in a quiet room, I feel fairly confident that the world has lost its mind, not me.

I did not watch, of course. I try to keep my distance from anything involving either of those guys, and especially anything that has both of them together. But I did end up seeing some clips on the comedy shows and whatnot, and while there was some amusement to be had in watching Dear Leader struggle mightily with the word “acetaminophen,” it mostly just ended up confirming my belief that at some point we slipped through a wormhole into a more absurd universe where the United States of America has turned into the Grand Duchy of Wackadoodlestan.

The other big story of the day was that ABC decided to put Jimmy Kimmel back on the air, which seems like… how you say… good news. I almost don’t know how to process it. For the record, I like Jimmy just fine, though I rarely watch his work — keeping up with Colbert and The Daily Show and John Oliver is quite enough — but anything that pisses off El Presidente while planting a flag for free speech is OK with me. I will watch his monologue tonight, maybe more than once; I want to see that YouTube number get up into the gazillions.

I was in a good mood this morning till I decided to check the news. There I learned that Orange Boy was giving a speech at the U.N., and despite my best work with the remote, I ended up seeing some of it. The ignorance, the arrogance, the outright hostility toward pretty much the whole world… it’s still shocking, though I guess we should be used to it by now.

Welp. As usual, I feel a little better for having vented. I’m going to go for a walk now. Hope your day is going well.