So in the time it took me to get all the way through Apocalypse Now, the NBA Playoffs, the World Cup, the Tour de France, and many other world and personal events came and went. In the interest of economy and brevity, I have composed some haikus to cover this lacuna.

I hate the Clippers
I wish we could have beat them
Andrew Bogut’s ribs 🙁

The pain of Brazil
Four goals scored in six minutes
Unprecedented

Do you believe that
Vincenzo Nibali is
Drug-free? Please discuss.

We have a new house
It’s full of boxes and cats
Please come and visit

Out of the boonies
Man, the Internet is fast!
What’s good on Netflix?

I have a new job
I know, it’s hard to believe
But what can you do?