On the way down to Grand Avenue recently I ran across the following poster plastered to the side of a newspaper box:


I’ve intentionally made this photo [Ed. Note: Now tragically lost in the sands of time] so low-res as to be unreadable, because the poster appears to be the result of someone’s disturbing love obsession, and the love object is mentioned by name several times in the course of a bizarre screed that reads as follows (all spelling, grammar, and opinions are the author’s):


[Girl’s name],

This is not a flyer, just a personal letter. Im so tired, your wearing me out. You got two coats of shellack off last night/this A.M. and I realize that you are determined to NEVER let me get the last word.

Your girlfriend/crime partner called me a filthy name, and YOU are going to take the punishment if I don’t get an apology and damn quickly.

Outside of that, I could find a “normal” relationship among the teenaged girls who LOVE my singing. I’m going to be playing/singing on the street, and making $$$ for my daily food, and glue etc. etc. Xeroxes cost a lot, and I don’t know if you appreciate all the love I put into trying to communicate with you.

I Want you so badly, and you need me so badly, your “girlfriend” who is jealous of my cool hair, (your never going to guess the current colour) I had it done back to my natural shade of Reddish Brown, and I got all the grey burned hair softened and looking like God created me. I look real nice cleaned up, and Everyone in town thinks your Insane for not loving me, and me insane for loving a Bitchface like you. No wonder your hanging out with a Piedmont Ave Petty Drug Dealer like “Purple Top”. She is a piece of crap, I’ve already made progress in finding out what her name is, who she is copping from, and why she is so nasty to me…

She wants to be your only lover, and resents the fact that I can Pound your cute chubby little Butt for hours and I have the heavy equipment, all she have is a plastic imitation and Stupid Looking Badly Coloured Hair.

So if you don’t want your powerlessness, poverty (my movie producer saw you panhandling last weekend by Bart Station. )and you and your nasty friend’s Dirty Business postered, broadcasted, and if I can talk myself into wasting the $$$, I put up a billboard on Piedmont Ave and Montclair, and take out ads in the newspapers……… I had better get some kind of intelligent response to all of this. I love you and I realize how stupid I am for loving such a Low Class Looser Drug Abusing Lying Bisexual Nasty Retarded Bitchface Scorpio such as you………

I love you,

Leonardo the Lover

My question is, is this guy a genuine murderous psycho, or just somebody who loves himself a little too much and can’t understand why this girl doesn’t? Discuss amongst yourselves.