So I was at my dad’s place. It was somewhat late at night. Struck with the urge to relieve my bowels, I looked around for some reading material and noticed America: The Book, with Jon Stewart on the cover, on the coffee table.

Upon seating myself, I flipped the book open at random to page 103 and read:

“Now that you have read the first five chapters and assimilated every word into the fiber of your being—or have randomly opened to this page while taking a dump—you are ready to learn about campaigns and elections.”

A chill ran down my spine. It seemed important at the time.