Statement of Policies and Principles, 2017

So yet another year is upon us. Reviewing last year’s output, I found that there was more of it than I thought, and that it was mostly of reasonable quality. This was heartening. There will be more to say and do, I think, but first I want to get a few things straight.

First off, I do not approve of my country’s recent choice of president. I do not consider his election legitimate, given that a) he lost the popular vote by several million and b) he was aided and abetted by the FBI, Russia, and Anthony Weiner’s penis. But what’s done is done, and I may on occasion have to make reference to him; so I have decided that on those occasions, I will use Jon Stewart’s apt coinage “Fuckface Von Clownstick.” President Von Clownstick is scheduled, barring deus ex machina, to take office in just over two weeks. The forecast is for, at minimum, corruption, mismanagement, and institutionalized racism; nuclear war does not seem out of the question, but I do my best to remain hopeful.

On that note, let’s move on to a happier subject, your Golden State Warriors. When last we saw the W’s, they had lost the NBA Finals but gained a Kevin Durant. I haven’t written about them since then because my officially stated position is this: There’s no point getting all worked up about the regular season again. Putting up gaudy win totals is nice, but the games that matter will be played in April, May, and June. I’ve still watched most of the games, but I’ve also missed a few, and it is — again — my officially stated position that this is fine.

Last night, for instance, I listened to the first few minutes on the radio, saw the rest of the first and part of the second quarter on TV. Then the friends that I was with wanted to watch something else, and I made not a sound. The W’s were crushing the Grizzles anyway.

Course, things didn’t quite turn out that way…apparently the Dubs went completely to pieces late in the game, squandering a 24-point lead and losing their 6th game of the season against 30 wins. And this is fine. Really. Quoth the Draymond:

I’m actually happy we lost today because there’s some things that we need to correct in order to win a championship, and that’s our goal. So trying to win every regular-season game really don’t matter. I want to see us get better each and every time we step on the floor, and I don’t feel like that’s been happening for the things we need to get better at. So I’m kind of thrilled that we lost because you usually make corrections when you lose.

Now could I circle back and relate that to the election? Sure, it’s almost too easy. In fact I’ll let you do it for yourself. I’ll be back soon, though, probably with something about David Bowie.

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