Desirable Elements of Information

Some now living will never die.

It’s been a while since I could just post about whatever I felt like, so I thought I might take a few minutes to update you, faithful readers, about some of my ongoing obsessions.

Abe Vigoda

According to every source of information at my disposal, Abe Vigoda remains alive. Among those who have shuffled off this mortal coil since I last wrote about Abe (2/25/11):

Andy Rooney
Amy Winehouse
Whitney Houston
Adam Yauch
Donna Summer
Ernest Borgnine
Sherman Hemsley
Gore Vidal
Phyllis Diller
Jack Klugman
Charles Durning
Norman Schwartzkopf
James Gandolfini
Peter O’Toole
Slim Whitman
Philip Seymour Hoffman
Elaine Stritch
Robin Williams

Just to name a few. Whereas Abe’s to-all-appearances-imminent death has been a running gag in popular culture for about 40 years now. Long may he reign.

Spam

For years I have been combing my spam comments for amusing tidbits, but at this point, quite frankly, I’m pretty over the whole thing. My tolerance for web spam has gone way down, as conversely my tolerance for meat Spam has gone way up. But just for old times’ sake, here are a few favorite sentences from recent months’ spam, with the key phrases in bold:

“Thanks iin favor of sharing such a fastidious thought, pice of writing is fastidious, thats why i have read it completely.”

“Hello my family member! I want to say that this article is awesome, nice written and include approximately all important infos.”

“We give inexpensive custom lanyards all over UK.”

“Happy myself I stumbled upon your web blog inadvertently, and i am stunned why this particular coincidence failed to was held prior! I bookmarked that.”

“What’s up, its nice article concerning media print, we all be familiar with
media is a enormous source of facts.”

“Your writing style has been amazed me.”

“What i do not realize is in truth how you’re not actually a lot more neatly-preferred than you may be right now. You are so intelligent.”

“Desirable element of information.”

” I think that you just can do with some p.c. to pressure the message house a bit.”

“Thanks a lot a great deal and i am looking forward to hint people. Can you nicely decline me a mailbox?”

“Beneficial day time great site! Person. Fantastic. Amazing. I’m going to search for your site and use the nourishes moreover.”

But there’s only one that I’m going to post in its entirety, because it is the only one that rises to the level of poetry toward which all spam should aspire:

“Several Ghouls with the stars soon enough experienced this rooster sitting down on the floor Julang. Lion conduct yourself decisively. Lava Longsi a good number of on – Normandy development. Exploring girlfriend proclaimed: If you can not believe the item. This lady usually idea Chu all of the 11 pro- grandmother, certainly, checked hence though ethereal singularity.|your feet|base|paws|legs|foot} sideways, Seven swordsmen Ginko nodded stringently Never.”

The Golden State Warriors

I feel like I neglected the Dubs a little bit by not writing about their last playoff series. On the other hand, it’s kind of a compliment that I no longer see their making the playoffs as shocking and revolutionary. Times have changed for Warriors fans. Our team is no longer a laughingstock, nor even a scrappy team of overachievers (see: 2007). They are a real contender with real expectations on their shoulders.

It hurt to see them go down to the LA Clippers in a hard-fought 7-game series, but not as much as it could have. The W’s went into the series handicapped by the loss of center Andrew Bogut, who would have been invaluable against the Clips’ huge and whiny front line. Then things got weird when Clippers owner Donald Sterling was caught saying horribly racist things and plunged into a scandal that would eventually result in his being forced to sell the team. Initially it seemed like this would help the Warriors, making the Clippers less motivated to win games for a team owned by a man they hated. But in the end it was a wash or may even have helped the Clips pull together in the face of adversity.

In any case, it was not the Warriors’ year, but this one may be. They jettisoned inspirational but strategy-challenged coach Mark Jackson in favor of impeccably pedigreed but untested Steve Kerr, which I think will turn out to be an upgrade. And while the team didn’t change significantly, they are more experienced and added a real backup point guard. If they can stay healthy (oh please, basketball gods, let them stay healthy) the sky’s the limit.

One Response to “Desirable Elements of Information”

  1. merle baggard Says:

    Read and noted.

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